On Resting.

Sometimes, you’re gonna have to rest.

You’re not going to want to, hell no – too many people rely on you, too many things to do, too many things that you want to do, see, hear, achieve, love.

But sometimes, even without realising it, your soul wanes, then your mind empties, and your body just gives out.  Then you have no choice but to collapse, no matter what you will or want.

You’ll make emergency contingency plans, and everyone will gladly help you in your hour of need – trust in this.

And suddenly, you gain that extra 5% more energy that tricks you into feeling nearly fine again, like you’ve just got over the worst of a cold and you’re recovering.

So you eagerly get up, pick up and start to re-juggle all the things you love in your life again, and it feels great.

Until your body suddenly gives out again.  Without warning.  And you’re back on the sofa, or in bed, eating chocolate and ice cream and chicken soup from a carton and watching Amelie again.

And it sucks.  Especially if it’s the third, fourth or eighth time you’ve let it happen.  It’s a sucky cycle that will continue to loop back around until you stop fighting it.  Because in order to recover?  You gotta stop fighting your exhaustion and thinking you’re fine because you picked yourself back up.  And it’s bloody hard to stop fighting it, I know.  You’re fighting to stop drowning – because that’s what it feels like, right?  It feels like you’re going to drown if you can’t do the things you want to do.  So you fight – to keep floating.

Shigure, one of the slightly older members of the family in Fruits Basket, says at one point:

“Geez, you kids – if only you just stopped fighting the water when you’re learning to swim, you’d learn that you would float on the surface anyway.  Much easier to swim when you’re floating.”*

*Or something similar, this isn’t a word-for-word quote.  But you catch my drift?

So bring in the supplies – bread, cans of food, ready meals, oven meals, frozen veg, easy fresh things like salads, and soft fruits like berries and apricots and plums, and comforting things like chocolate and ice cream if that comforts you.  Just maybe not too much chocolate and ice cream, because that might also make you feel bad after a while when taken in large quantities.  Order Netflix.  Fluff up your pillow and take back your blanket from the cat.  Buy a new videogame if necessary.

Ask for your loved ones to return the love that you give them just this once.

And sleep.  Rest.  Apologise to your body for mistreating it when it needed to heal if necessary.  Anything that helps you to rest (for the love of all things holy, REST).

In peace, your soul will wax again and fill back up, then your mind returns to near normality, and your body rejuvenates.  As soon as you feel it, that sudden 5% bloom in energy – give yourself another 3 days or so to recover.

Break the cycle.

Because you have to.

In peace, and laughter when Amelie gets her revenge on Collignon…

Catherine

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