Tag Archives: loving yourself

What to do when you encounter the parts of yourself you hate

I’ve written before about when parts of yourself that you haven’t acknowledged lately or taken care of suddenly burst to the forefront and make themselves known – they demand to be acknowledged, loved and remembered. There are the parts of yourself that you actually like that do this – for me most recently, it’s my Japanese self that wanted to be remembered and loved a little.

However, I’d be surprised if many people can tell me that they completely love every aspect of themselves, that they haven’t left parts of themselves behind they disliked, disloved and decided to disown.

I know I have done this several times over the years. In self-help circles, we’re often told to make peace with and kiss goodbye to all the bits of yourself that you hate and that don’t serve you right now and into the future.

So this is what we try to do – make peace with yourself, kiss them goodbye – and you feel so much lighter and happier, and you can experience joy and carry on with your life with a rose-scented future.

But once in a while, even when you think you’ve achieved this state, that you’re free from all the things that you don’t like within yourself, they come back with a vengeance.

Continue reading

On Honouring Yourself During The Long Winter

May the Spring come...please!

May the Spring come…please!

It’s February (just in case it passed you by).  February is the month I associate with the Japanese sakura/cherry blossom petals fall from the trees signifying the end of the worst of winter and the beginning of Spring.  It also often signifies the first blooms of love, because it’s quite romantic walking along a path lined with sakura trees when the petals float down all around you and get caught in your hair.
Or at least, I associate it with February because that’s when I usually see it happening in London, but with the severe rains and flooding we’ve had, I’m not sure if they’ll bloom quite yet.  In Japan, it happens at varying times between January and May, depending on the weather during this time.  I hear they’ve had severe snow over there whilst we’ve been having the rains, so maybe it’ll be a while yet before I hear about the blooms.  There is a calendar that helps predict the timing of blossoms:
So, why am I talking about the sakura?
Because seeing it reminds me of my Japanese self – the part of me that is also Japanese.  It reminds me to respect and honour that part of myself and any other parts of myself that I have recently neglected.  Neglecting parts of yourself can sometimes fragment yourself without realising it – it’s like walking a couple of miles and suddenly realising you’ve left a piece of yourself somewhere along your path, and on realising this, you don’t feel whole, altogether, full. Continue reading

On the Looming Valentine’s Day and Loving Yourself

Ah.  Valentine’s Day is looming on the horizon.  It’s gotta be the second most emotionally charged day in the year (after Christmas, of course!).  As much as it tries somehow to promote love through the violent death of St Valentine (…and fatten corporate profits after the post-Christmas slump…), it tends to create an equal force of loathing to balance out the fuzziness.  It’s the Ying-Yang balance personified in a single annual date.

Me?  I’m going with my other half to the Carole Nash Motorbike Show at Excel in London on Valentine’s Day to drool over sexy metal over at the MV Agusta and KTM stands.  Getting hot and sweaty over fierce machines makes great foreplay.  Well, for us, at any rate.



I actually want to make a slightly more serious point today about the Big L-word:

Sarah Cooper, a lovely friend of mine has been thinking over something recently that is often banded about by various wellness and self-help circles:

“You can only love someone as much as you love yourself”.


Continue reading

Enter your email below and get Letters From The Kitchen Table - learnings, love and wholesomeness on and off your plate

* indicates required